(reblogged from coldhandboyack)
Welcome to another edition of Lisa Burton Radio. Now broadcasting at one point twenty-one jigawatts across all the known galaxy, alternate realms, and into the future and past. I’m your host, Lisa the robot girl.
Our guest today is Limbreth, a young woman, on a quest to recover a stolen book and find the Bow of Hart.
“Welcome to the show, Limbreth.”
“Greetings from the Forest of Auguron, Lisa Burton.”
“My bio says you’ve joined this quest with a Withling named Hastra. Who’s leading this quest, you or her?”
“Hastra’s in charge but gets a lot of advice from Gweld, an elven ranger and these two dauntless dwarves, Tordug and Makwi. Hastra knows the most about our foe and the Bow of Hart. But these feckless Rokans stole her book, back in the City of Auguron using this magical creature she calls a Bane.”
“Dwarves! I love dwarves. We had a bunch of them at the writing cabin for a while.”
“Yes, Dwarves! We could use a few more of us on this trip, Limbreth. The more to teach you a thing or two about what it means to be an axe-maiden who’s been blessed with the death-grip.
“And who might you be, sir?”
“Name’s Tordug. Me and Makwi only showed up for the fun of finishing up what Limbreth started when she charged, wounded – can you believe that, Lisa? – into a pack of trolls to save Athson. It’s worthy of a song! Really, Lisa, you should have seen her glowing silver in the moonlight. We couldn’t pry one of her swords from her hand afterward (we call that the death-grip). Those trolls were right scarred before we got there. Why–
“Yeah, honey, maybe we can interview you next time. Assuming you survive this adventure.”
“Sorry, Tordug and Makwi made me an honorary member of their society and I’m not sure yet what to make of that.”
“Now Limbreth, it seems to me this book is important, but the Bow of Hart is important too. Our listeners want to know, which one is the bigger deal?”
“Well as far as I can understand, The Bow of Hart is supposed to be used on Magdronu, the dragon. He’s trying to stop us from getting the bow. We expect one of his wizardly servants named Corgren might have it so we’re going to the fallen dwarven kingdom, Chokkra, to find it. Corgren’s got trolls who attacked us and Rokan spies that have Hastra’s book too. Magdronu had Corgren and his trolls ransack Athson’s village years ago so somehow he’s mixed up in the bow – at least that’s what Hastra says. Athson knows some of it but he doesn’t understand his connection to it all.”
“So I’m getting the sense that the bow is more important to you. While Athson is a little bit messed up, you think he can take care of Cogren and Magdronu if he gets this bow.
“I’m clear on that much, but I want to know what’s in it for you?”
“Well, I fell in with Hastra after I left home to show my father, um, well, I mean I’m here for the adventure and… Well, anyway, Athson can handle himself even if he does see things like that dog. But he’s not seeing dead people from his past anymore since he got that sword. I just wish he and I could spend more time, um, scouting for the group like we did before Marston’s Station. Right now we’re riding with a bunch of elven rangers as far as their forts near the Troll Heaths and we don’t get that much time together, um, for scouting. But we’ll get him to the bow. I’ve got his back. He’ll do what he needs to. He doesn’t miss with a bow, just throwing knives sometimes…”
“It sounds like quite the predicament. How are you holding up to life on the trail? It can’t be easy with all those men around.”
“Well, there’s Hastra to keep me company. And really, everyone in our group’s experienced. It’s an incredible adventure and my father will, um, he’ll see… Anyway, I like being around other warriors. But, to be honest I’m a little worried how my feet will hold up when we start walking. I’m more used to riding horses and these boots the dwarves got me back at Marston’s Station are a bit uncomfortable. But I’ll make it.”
“I’m into fashion, and I have to know, what do you wear out on the trail? Is it long dresses, or pants and pirate boots? Maybe you have some cool custom battle armor.”
“Dresses? Seriously? Maybe back at cour-, uh, home but not here. I wear this white dueling armor made of leather and tough leggings that match. Other than that I keep my hair in a braid so I can reach either sword strapped to my back. Why? What do you wear on an adventure?”
“I tend to wear short skirts that let me move freely. I also carry the B.A.G.; that stands for big assed gun. It’s kind of like magic. It’s computer coded to my hands so only I can shoot it.”
Read the rest of the interview here.